Archive for the ‘Reader Stories’ Category:
June 23rd, 2010
Deadly Combo
From: CorbanDallas
I had been living in Costa Rica for nearly two years and had already experienced many episodes of diarrhea, but nothing could have prepared me for what was soon going to invade my poor body…submitted for the approval of the Number Two Guide society, I call this story: The Tale of Cryptosporidiosis
I was enjoying a quiet weekend in the small South Caribbean town of Puerto Viejo. A surfing village with great beaches, exquisite Caribbean cuisine, friendly locals, tourists from around the world, and annoying cracked out ex-pats. I was drinking the water, eating the food, sharing the bathroom and showers at the hostel, which was nothing out of the ordinary. Everything seemed fine…until I was leaving, taking the bus back to my house — two hours north of this fine port city.
Suddenly, it felt like something was eating the inside of my stomach. It was painful and I wanted it out of my body. Luckily, (well not so luckily because I was still on the bus) my body was one step ahead and initiated the abort sequence. I felt like I was going to vomit and have an episode of diarrhea at the same time. I managed to control my bodily functions for the next twenty minutes, which happened to be the worst twenty minutes of my life. Read more…
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March 24th, 2010
Leyton says:
Ok so I was at summer camp and we were on a super long hike. I REALLY had to go! So I asked my friend what i Should do because I was about to crap myself! She said go to the back of the line then get off the trail. And thats just what i did. I dont have very good direction apperently because i ended up in FRONT of the line. I didn’t see them so i dropped my pants and the stuff started coming! But then I heard them coming. I pulled my pants as fast as I could. But the stuff was still coming! So every one saw me crap myself and for the rest of the trail I had to wear my messy pants. And when I say messy, I mean it was diarrhea and was comming down my legs!!!!
Read more…
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October 28th, 2009
Who's going to answer?
Unique and clever or sexy and showing are the only two categories your Halloween costume can fall under if you take this holiday seriously. And you should. Halloween is the one holiday that always surpasses the hype.
You have had 365 days to think of a costume, I expect an effort. All of you pimps, 80’s rock stars and Gods gift to women costumes I roll my eyes and applaud. If it was not for your lack of inspiration my costumes might not be as special every year.
Much like poop, the poop costume ideas do not get thrown around very often. However, there are some un-flushables. The costumes you cannot help but laugh at.
It is very difficult, and some might say impossible, to make a poop costume sexy, which is why most fall under the clever category.
This years Poop Costume Award goes to:
When Doody Calls
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July 16th, 2009
From: Pooper101MJ
It was my sophomore year at college and I was eating lunch on campus at our school union. Suddenly I got an uncomfortable urge that required my immediate attention. Usually I hate pooping in public places and try to avoid it at all costs, however, I knew that I did not have much time to mess around looking for the ideal spot.
Luckily, the union actually has wonderful facilities. It is cleaned a few times a day, has both the manual and a back-up sensor activated automatic flush on every toilet, and those little paper sheet things you can put down on the seats.
I rushed to an open stall, got the paper seat thing down and the process started flowing instantly. It was the best feeling in the world for me, and the nastiest sound in the world for the one other person in the bathroom. After the initial burst, I decided to take my time and relax for the remainder.
I could not see any feet in the stall next to me due to very low stall doors, but I could hear someone there making noise. Then the person gave a flush. I was glad to hear the flush because I hate it when others are in the bathroom with me. However, after the flush there was no buckling of the pants, no zipper sound, no movement at all. Read more…
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July 15th, 2009
- Sausage links
From Dan H.
saw a fun graffiti in a toilet stall:
drawing of a 14″ sausage shaped turd with this poem:
Here I sit
full of bliss
just squeezed out
a turd like this
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July 14th, 2009
got milk?
The purpose of a shock ad campaign is to create a car wreck. Something so terrifying you cannot look away. Torbay, a town in Southwest England has done just that. The town has launched a new shock ad campaign depicting a child in a park eating a pile of dog feces in an attempt to scare people into picking up after their pets.
Although many people would find this campaign a bit on the extreme side, it seems to be getting the message across. Mayor David Butt (insert joke) reported incidents of dog related messes have been cut in half from April to June.
Shockingly, there has not been any complaints from locals on the new campaign. Torbay must be a laid back town. Every place I have every lived there is always some crazy local that would see something like this and make a big deal out of it. Raise a stink. Read more…
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