Jenkem – The Human Waste Drug
A new drug has reportedly squeezed its way into several Florida high schools. Jenkem, aka Butt Hash, aka The Poop Drug, was originally thought to be a hoax, because how could you not think this was a hoax?
Wikipedia defines Jenkem as, “an alleged hallucinogenic recreational drug composed of noxious gas formed from fermented feces.”
Basically, you poop into a bottle then cover the top of the bottle with a balloon. You let this contraption sit while the poop ferments and the gases get trapped in the balloon. Once there is enough fermented poop, you remove the balloon and inhale the gas. A true modern day high.
According to a bulletin released by the Collier County Sheriffs office, which can be found here, “once ingested the onset of the high takes approximately 10 seconds with the most severe hallucinations happening in approximately 20 minutes. Several articles indicate that the subject immediately passes out after ingesting the gas then regains a magical/hallucinogenic state within seconds of regaining consciousness.”
I don’t know whether to laugh or cry. Do we blame the economy? Do we blame the school system or parents? Do we use the phrase, “kids these days?”
The jury is still out on if this is actually a hoax or not. Regardless, the story is out, and that means dumb kids across America are now trying this to impress their dumb friends.
One thing is for sure, we still have not scratched the surface when it comes to harnessing the awesome power of poop. I just hope this does not catch on. The last thing we need is drug dealers approaching you on the streets telling you that they have “good shit”, and actually meaning it.