“Wait a Minute – I’m Wiping!”
My senior year of college I lived with 5 other friends. We only had two bathrooms in the entire house and due to the locations of the rooms and the bathrooms 5 of us basically shared one. It was not uncommon to be waiting for the toilet or shower, which can cause some annoyance, but no one really cared. This lack of care led to a laid back bathroom demeanor.
One time I was dropping a deuce and someone knocked on the door.
As almost knee jerk reaction I yelled, “Wait one freaking minute I am wiping!
There was silence on the other end of the door, which was a bit odd, but I thought nothing of it. When I finished the dump I opened the door only to see a woman in her 40s standing there looking embarrassed enough for the both of us. Turns out it was my roommate mother visiting, who I had never met before.
I am now known as,“the guy who was wiping.
Moral of the story: Always check ahead when it’s parents weekend and plan your poops accordingly.